On Uniqueness and Unity

As I take my daily walk, the usual string of random thoughts barrage me. One takes over the others: the thought of my own uniqueness. We are all vain little things in our heart of hearts, always believing that we are more special than anyone else. We say to ourselves, no one thinks or acts the way I do. And sometimes we smirk to ourselves, reveling in the thought that no one else could be as we are. We think we are so unique.

But then, life challenges this belief again and again. I sometimes have ideas or experiences that I thought no one ever had before. But upon research I am surprised to find that many have had that idea before I did and in fact have created something beautiful by it. I would feel demotivated, asking myself what was the point in trying to do something when everyone out there has already done it? Are we really that different from one another?

We’re all still the same

Despite all the moments we have where we feel like we are so distinct from everyone else, we often find that we are all just the same—human beings. We cry, we laugh, we love and get hurt—we feel. We are all searching for answers to the same questions. And not one answer can fit all.  The funny bit is that, contrary to popular belief, it’s not as bad as it sounds. It’s not, “oh, I’m just live everyone else, I’m not special.” It’s actually quite comforting. Just think, we’re not alone in the world. We’re all in this together. Someone understands us. Someone feels as we do. And sometimes, in the most hopeless situations, that can mean the world and spell the difference between life and death.

So, this brings me to this statement: despite the pride we feel in being unique or one-of-a-kind, we discover that it gets lonely. We’re all struggling to find someone to connect and relate with. In fact, we are delighted to discover that we have the same feelings and experiences. Take a look online and you’ll find that the posts that are the most relatable are the ones that get more likes. Check out the memes that get shared around the globe because a lot of people, in one way or another, experienced the same thing. This tells us that despite our uniqueness among the 7.8 billion rough people in the world, the same number of people can still be united by an endless amount of things from the mundane, everyday things to the deep, complicated depths of humanity.

The advantages of similarity

The benefit to this is that we all have similar experiences we can draw lessons from. Okay, this idea was done before, but what can I do to make it better? What can I offer from my experiences that can make this idea my own? The point is to not take it as a setback, but as a stepping stone and in some cases even a validation that yes, this product or idea has been done and it has, in fact, succeeded!

Also, it tells us that no matter what situation we are in, someone has most probably been in the same one and have triumphed! We are not alone in that sense and we can use that knowledge to inspire us to continue and succeed as well.

The good thing about being unique

On the other hand, being unique means we are incomparable. We cannot contrast ourselves against each other because we each have different experiences and principles. The only judgment that would be fair would be to compare ourselves to our own selves. This makes us strive to continually improve and grow to become better.

So the next time you start comparing yourself to one person, think of how we are all unique to help you overcome any feelings of inferiority or superiority. Life is not a competition, and winning or losing some battles doesn’t make you better or worse than anyone else.

The comforting irony

It may be difficult to grasp at first, this concept of standing apart, yet still being together. I think of us as being pieces of one gigantic jigsaw puzzle. We are all different—in shape, pattern, and edge—but we are united in the fact that we are all puzzle pieces. No one is better than the other. Each one is needed to form a complete picture.

Looking closely at our edges we marvel at how different we are and how no one is like us, but upon looking at the bigger picture we see that everyone else is as well. Then we realize that maybe, we’re not so unique in that sense, after all.

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